There is nothing like a bond with your family. All the material things, financial gains, and success you achieve are nothing without your family there to support you. Not only that, but your family is there while you are trying to achieve those things and often times when you are at a low point while trying to achieve and gain your successes. Families possess a bond that should not be broken at any time. Some people have lost loved ones and feel alone and they wish they could have a solid family unit once again. Family is everything.
But when does the family ties that we have in our lives become too much that it becomes a crutch in hinders the natural order of things? Is it even possible? The answer is yes. Sometimes we have to learn what our families are and what they are not. Some are too dependent on those family ties.
Some individuals cannot even make decisions without their family input. At a certain age, your mother and father should be just a sounding board; they have done their job in raising you. But there are some people who still cling really hard to their parents that it begins to affect their marriages and their other relationships. I have seen many male/female relationships that are affected by overbearing and domineering parents. Domineering mothers are in their sons businesses interjecting themselves into every aspect of their son’s lives. Sometimes it even causes upheaval in the relationship and the wife gets to a point where she is at the end of her rope. The mother believes she is the only that can care for her son and the wife or girlfriend is not someone who can do what she has done for all of these years. The son is so weak that both his mother and his wife are controlling him.
I have even seen some adults be so clingy to their parents that they believe that their parents are their friends and they don’t do anything with anybody else. Whether it be for financial security, or fear of missing out on something they cut ties to everyone else. These adults are so dependent on their parents that they do everything with them dinner, social events, everything. There is no separation. That is not healthy for the relationship. Parents and their children need separate friends and activities, especially as the kids get older and are adults. I am thirty-five and would not dream of spending every waking moment with my mom and dad, not that I do not love them very much but that is not healthy and not that they would want to anyway. My mother and father live a very active life and they do not need to be around their adult children every moment of every day. I love spending time with them, but they are not the only people in my life. They understand and appreciate that and do not make me feel guilty for it, but there are a lot of parents who do.
I have seen some parents have total or respect for their adult children. Some parents just show up unannounced at their children’s homes and bombard them. Some kids also have that attitude as well. They feel entitled. It is not healthy at all. Why is this happening? If you do speak up, the parents make you feel guilty so you just stop doing it and let them do it. Parents, you have to give your children space and not interject yourself into their marriages, businesses, and finances, to sum it up their personal lives. Children, you have to do the same thing as you all are grown. It is time to loosen up those family ties a bit. It is so vital to maintaining a healthy, loving adult relationship.
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